This is it. This is the game I’m playing. These are the six goals I’m committed to completing in 2016. When I complete all six, I win the game.
Yes, I’m putting them out for everyone to see. This is not for me to be held accountable by anyone. Nor am I motivated wanting to achieve them to maintain face publicly. You guys know me well enough to know that “maintaining face” is meaningless to me as I bare my soul and my shortcomings and my humanity on a daily basis.
I’m putting this out there because I’m committed to being a human being who shares her authentic journey.
And I’m so excited to celebrate with you when I hit them.
The goals inspire me and frighten me.
And I know this:
1) Two goals on this list I can achieve without significant effort
2) The other four are goals I cannot hit with who I am at this time.
Yes, the Stacy I am today cannot hit four of these six goals.
And that would have sent me into an addicted tailspin at a previous time in my life.
I am in the process of recovering from five addictions:
4) Compulsively and mindlessly surfing the internet online for hours
5) Compulsively and mindlessly checking my phone every couple minutes
However, I’m out of the cycle of addiction and just this past week, I realize I’ve gone from a dry drunk in my food addiction to sober in my food addiction.
And within this space, I know I can grow into the person who will achieve these goals with ease.
The Stacy I am growing into being absolutely can achieve these six goals. And with each passing day as I heal and get stronger in recovery, these goals become more and more real.
These are not wish-a, wish-a, hope-a, hope-a goals. These are six things I am giving my word to achieving. It is done. They are completed. They will be achieved.
My relationship to my word is that strong now. My trust with myself is that strong now. That’s what I’ve been working on the last 15 months since I got sober.
And the more sober I become with everything in my life and with myself, the more I cross the bridge from “it would be AWESOME to achieve these goals but I actually don’t believe I can” to “oh, because I spoke it into existence.
I am a woman with no limits.
And I understand that for many, many people in my life, especially the closest ones, I’ve violated trust and integrity and my word ALLLL over the place, and if you judge me by my past then that will keep coming up and I will occur as someone who isn’t trustworthy,
I realize in many ways I occur as the boy who cried wolf.
And I also get I’ve created HUGE goals in the past, and not hit them, and failed not just myself but people around me who were counting on me.
My leadership sucked. My follow-thru sucked. My customer service sucked.
It’s amazing now that I’m sober from a FOOD addiction (and all the underlying ones as well) how much I can absolutely see and be with how much I messed up and how many people I let down. And I can heal it, restore it, and let it go.
I’ve healed the violations, the lack of integrity, and distrust within myself. My life works now.
Now, I’m going for it. I’ve had these goals for a couple months and been refining them and refining them and I’ve talked about them on Periscope.
I want to restore trust with my word to those who I have let down. So I’m putting it all on the line (as Cassie said). Doing this publicly.
I commit to delivering these six goals. No matter what.
Because I was so afraid of failing before that putting goals publicly was just me addicted to disappointment. I *hoped* I would hit them, but I didn’t know myself to truly be the person who could hit them. My relationship to my word and my integrity were not strong. My relationship to my addictions ran everything.
I’ve broken free from the seductive liars of addiction and am ready to cause miracles.
I’ve been working and working and working and working on myself to figure out how to be someone who can cause their life to be what they want. I think I finally got to that place.
And so I’m taking a huge risk, and putting my six huge goals out there. One could be doable. Two might be a challenge. But SIX? Six would be creating magic. Six would be me knowing myself to be the woman I’ve always wanted to know myself to be. Six would be me being huge, unstoppable, and a woman who can create a real difference in the world. Six would be me being a wizard in my own life.
I create myself to be a wizard in my own life and in the lives and experiences of those around me that I love.
These six goals move more more than I can say. And I love, love, love working on them.
So there you go. You’re now part of my journey for 2016. Grab some popcorn or grab a notepad because this is going to be a ride.
PS – there’s a secret 7th goal that I’m not sharing publicly yet. Not because I don’t think I hit it – I know I will – but because it gives away too much of the game by sharing it. So it’s mine. And when I hit it, you know I’ll let you know.
PPS – Don’t forget to put your name on my emailing list (right hand side, baby!) Big things coming down the pike. You don’t want to miss it!